MAD (My Awesome Delirium)
by TimeyWimeyGirl4
Summary: A little random oneshot (May become a twoshot) where the Mad Hatter invites every slightly crazy person in the universe to tea on a very strange and slightly purple planet. Pretty un-canon, with no real plot. Just fun.


_A/N: Hi, it's me again! I found this sitting in my documents folder, long forgotten and thought "Why not?" So here it is, let me know if you want it continued. BTW, for my readers of We Must Never Speak of This Again, I am almost done with the last chapie, just hang in there!_

I picked up my mug and took a sip of - nothing! _What!? I'm out of tea again?!_ I thought, staring at the empty mug despondently.

"Bad mug, bad!" I pointed at it with a disapproving look and put a period at the end of the sentence I was typing. "Fine, have it your way!" I sighed at the mug. I'm talking to a mug. Huh. I am so awesome. I thought, setting my laptop beside me and standing up, mug in hand, to go make more tea.

_**The air above the laptop quivered and shook, until a purple glowing portal opened above it. Out of the portal a donut landed on the keyboard, but was quickly sucked up again, and a faint "Oopsies. Ha ha ha!" Was heard. After a moment an old, yellowing envelope dropped on the keyboard and the portal closed right before footsteps were heard outside the room.**_

"Alright, I have tea, and I have thoughts, and I have my laptop. I think I'm good." I said with a smile, sitting down beside my laptop. "And apparently I have... a letter?" The envelope was addressed to me in scrawling, almost unreadable handwriting. I reached for it, and felt a tingling in my fingertips as I touched it. Inside was a sliver of paper, stained with blotches of spilled tea. The same strange handwriting filled the paper.

_Hello person!_

_You Are invited to a mad tea party for the mad, oh wait, I already said that! Wait no I didn't! At 4:00 Light the bubbling candle inside this letter and think of something hilarious! Like a canary turning purple! See you there!_

_Sincerly, ME! _

"This. Is. Weird." I looked at the clock. 3:53 glowed from it's display. "Well, what if it's a trap?" I asked the mug in my hand. A million thoughts ran through my head, most involving aliens and blue boxes. The envelope still sat on my computer keyboard. I picked it up and took out... something. I wasn't sure what it was. It was about the same size as a marker, and the color was dark blue. There was a wick protruding from the top, and the weirdest thing was that it was covered in ever-moving, ever-changing soap bubbles. They seemed to erupt from the top and disappear when they reached the bottom. I checked the clock. 3:59. I got a box of matches and lit one, and holding it close to the wick I thought of a ridiculous part of one of my favorite books. "Mad cows! Your all mad cows!" I laughed as I lit the candle. Suddenly I was flying through space, screaming and whooping and somehow breathing as well. I waved at the stars as I zoomed past them. And then, just as abruptly as it had started, it stopped.

I looked up. There were two half-moons high in the sky, which was a mix of orange and purple, swirling together, and the clouds were an alarming shade of pink. I was in a small clearing which held a cute little cottage beside a pond surrounded by flowers and trees "Umm... what exactly am I supposed to do now?" I asked the mug, which was still in my hand. I walked down a stone path, stopping to smell the flowers, and into the house.

The inside was almost as incredible as the outside. There was a large, wicker, canary cage shaped chair hanging by a chain in the corner. It had a mound of purple flowery cushions inside and looked very comfortable. The whole room was a creamy yellow with lavender polka dots. However one of the most remarkable things about it was that it was all cushioned. The ceiling, the floor, the walls, they were all padded. There were teacups hanging from the ceiling on bits of twine, and spoons lay in piles on the floor. "Hello?" I called. There was no one there. Suddenly I heard laughter outside. I opened the door and found, exactly where I had landed just a few moments ago, a huge long table full of teacups and platters and jars. Around the table sat a huge amount of people, whilst many others stood, looking befuddled.

"Come and join the party!" A jolly voice boomed from the midst of the crowd. I walked back down the path and saw a brown haired woman with a screwdriver hanging about at the edge.

"Do you know what's going on?" I asked her.

"No, I really don't." She answered. Just then a short man in a multicolored suit and a huge top hat climbed on top of the table.

"Hello everyone!" He shouted. "I am the Mad Hatter! Are you wondering why I brought you my ear? I mean here?" He took a sip of his tea and through the cup down onto the table. It shattered. "Thith ith the MAD convention!" He shouted with a lisp. He looked around expectantly, as if he thought someone would know what he was talking about. "You are all here becauth you are mad!" He laughed hysterically for a second and then continued. "Which came first: The chicken or the egg?"

"What's the mad convention?" Someone in the crowd shouted.

"It means that every bonkers person in the universe is invited to tea." The Mad Hatter responded. "SO HAVE TEA!" He jumped up and down and ended up crashing off the table.

"This is... rather strange." I said slowly, to no one in particular.

"I'm wondering if that's a good thing or a bad thing." Replied the brown haired woman, although I hadn't been talking to her.


End file.
